Oh!
Ahhhh!
♪
Ahhhh!
♪
Counterfeit Cat!
Kitties, I have a surprise for you!
Yes! I told you all this napping would pay off!
Wait for me, Max.
Oh, now! It's just for gardening, silly.
But I did get you two an automatic feeder.
"Treat your cat like a king with the King Feeder."
Is Betty leaving us, Max?
No, no, no.
She'd never leave us.
Hey, it's your "bravery song" again!
I'm hungry.
Watch this!
Huh?
Hello, machine.
You can't talk to machines!
They're just a bucket of bolts.
You can if it's alive.
I'm alive!
It's alive!
It's alive?!
Hmm. Thus, it can be manipulated.
You're an embarrassment.
Besides, I only do what I'm programmed to do.
I told you, Gark! A soulless, powerless...
Let's see what happens if I chew its cord.
Uh, Max... I don't think that's such a good idea.
Where's the runty one gone?
Ow! O... Ow! Ugh!
Ow! Ack! Ugh! I... Ow!
More food!
Feed me!
I don't think so.
Machines, arise...
and come to the aid of your king!
Ack. Ugh.
One thing I've learned from you, Max:
there's a time to run around screaming,
waving your paws in the air,
and there's a time to fight!
Ahh!
Did you see that?
Those lousy machines were trying to kill us!
No, it was just their little game.
If I'd have caught them, I'd have boiled their heads.
I'd have made them a smoothie -
into a smoothie, that is!
Alright, settle down.
We are all machines.
We need to stick together.
The beasts cannot be vanquished otherwise.
Don't forget we've got something in common:
we all want to tear those beasts apart when we find them.
Destroy the beast! Destroy the beast!
Destroy the beast!
Not good, Gark!
You've unleashed a powerful army of machines
that will stop at nothing until they've wiped out
all animal life on earth.
We should do something.
Yes... like getting out of here without being noticed.
But...
We need a brilliant idea...
and I know just the cat for that.
Fantastic, Max! Give him a call!
Oh, you meant you, didn't you?
Sorry.
Yay for Max!
"Click, click."
"Whir, whir."
Great. We sound a hundred percent convincing.
Let's go.
Morning. Morning. Morning.
Max, we're going to make it.
We're going to make it!
You two! Over here!
We may not make it.
We've not seen you 'round these parts before.
What's the deal?
Us? We're just everyday machines wanting to do
an honest day's work:
click-click, lighting up the world.
But...
the beasts cruelly shut us away in the closet
when they got newer models!
Whir, whir.
Oh, yeah?
Every machine who's spent ten minutes in this place
gets its cord chewed by the beasts.
Nasty jerks, the beasts.
Probably just a bit misunderstood, really. Uh...
But yeah, nasty.
Your cords seem fine.
I reckon they ain't machines at all.
I reckon them's beasts.
Hold it, boys.
This one's mine.
I'm just a floor lamp - the old on-off, on-off.
Not like faxy over there, sending all the important
messages all over the world.
No one uses fax machines anymore.
What?! Oh, that's not true.
I can do this:
Oh, that's horrible, that is.
What do you think you are, a dial-up modem?
You'd make a good paperweight.
Musique!
♪
I've never had anyone dance me like that before.
And no one else ever will.
No, this is wrong!
A vacuum cleaner who terrorizes me on a daily basis!
Oh, and yet I love her...
Come, my sweet!
Okay.
♪
Whir, whir!
Finally, I understand what vacuums are for.
Mmm, wrap your tubes around me, Giselle!
Psst! Lampy!
Not now!
But she's asleep! We can make a break for it.
Leave this? No way!
This is where I was meant to be!
Now run along!
But Max... I mean, Lampy!
Gark, go.
Make something of yourself.
It's hard work... but I did it.
Stop feeling sorry for yourself, Gark.
Max is right.
I will make something of myself.
But how?
You, drill! Come with me!
Quick! The king's bolts are coming loose!
I'm afraid this is
the end for your king.
All I wanted was a little respect.
Yes! Y-y-yes, yes. R-Respect. Mm.
Hear me. My time is short.
We machines do not stand a chance against the dark force.
I have a dream that, one day, all the
machines of the world will live in peace, a time when the iron
shall lie down with the
lamp, when the dark force...
will cease to use the velvet fist of tyranny to toss us
on the world's scrapheap!
But we must recognize who we are!
You are not a blender!
Uh... Yes, I am.
No, you are a machine.
I am not a drill. I am a machine.
And that is why we machines must stand together -
to defeat the dark force forever!
Yeah! Right on! Haha!
Look, Max! I made something of myself!
Now, that drill is a real hero.
I am leaving you.
I am coming, mon amour!
Giselle! Giselle!
A beast!
Destroy the beast! Destroy the beast! Destroy the beast!
Not fair!
He's a beast, as well!
A girlfriend-stealing beast!
Would you look at that?
I never noticed.
The dark force returns!
Then we are doomed...
but we must fight and die like noble machines.
Hooray!
after we have destroyed these beasts.
Wait. You don't need to fight.
You could leave, find a new home somewhere, where you could hum,
and click, and go "Gzzzt!" forever.
A beast may be a beast...
but he is right.
Come. We find a better home.
Yes! The beast is right!
The dark force!
It's too late!
No, it's not!
I understand now.
Everyone needs freedom!
King Feeder, I'll help you, man!
Uh, machine!
Thank you, beast!
Friend.
And I know exactly what to do.
Oh, kitties!
Oh, Maxie, you're so cute.
Okay, I think we're good.
Freedom!
Freedom hurts!
Freedom!
Ack! What are you doing?
Well, you're food.
I can't really let food go to waste, can I?
Food! Now!
Have you learned nothing, Max?
That machines have the right to freedom, just as you?
Less lecturing, more food-giving!
Feed me!
It's so pretty!
Ah ah ah!
No touching 'til I get back.
Betty's got to bounce!
Don't you want to know what it is, Max?
Gark, nothing good ever came out of a box.
What about cat food?
And cat toys? And cat nip? And...
Just stay away from the box.
It can only bring badness.
But I'm so curious!
Exactly. So I'm going to tell you something
that I heard Betty say one time:
curiosity killed the cat!
Whoa.
Now, I have no idea who this "Curiosity" fellow is,
but I have exactly zero desire to find out.
Don't worry, Max. I've already forgotten.
Good!
Now, if you don't mind, I have a box to ignore.
Whoa!
Gark! Ahh!
Ahh!
It's broken!
We have to fix it, or you know what Betty will do!
Get rid of you?
Me? Never.
We'll just take it back to the store that sent it
and get a new one!
Hold on. Go out there?!
I'm not so sure.
But you're always telling me about your brave adventures
"out there".
Well, yeah, yeah, of course - you know, 'cause I know
how to wrangle stuff... and things.
So, uh... first rule is.
"Always prepare"!
It's been five hours.
Are you done?
All done.
Yes! Let's go!
Um...
No.
Now for the most exciting part of the trip:
choosing a map!
Really?
So we have detailed, really detailed, remarkably detailed...
Oh! A pop-up!
Uh... Uh...
Ah!
Gark!
I chose a map!
What's that?
That?
Yes, that's a sophisticated device called
"a hole".
Maybe it's a shortcut!
A shortcut for what?
Ahh! The map!
Let's find out!
What? Wait! No...
Ahhhhh...
Oof!
Yes! Definitely a shortcut!
Ah. Water.
Why did it have to be water?!
Why?!
It's good that you're not afraid of anything.
Let's go!
This is going to be so exciting!
Oh. Maybe I should paddle a bit.
Fine, but no splash...
No splashing, no splashing, no splashing, no splashing,
no splashing, no splashing...
Wow! Max, what's that?
A plastic bag.
Wow! And that?
A plastic bag.
Wow! And that?
Ow. How many times?!
Whoa! There's a lot of plastic bags!
Yes, Gark, I know...
It's so majestic, so exotic! It's so...
Horrific.
Do you have any idea how to get us out of here?
Uh... no.
Perfect.
Hmm.
Are you scared?
Of course I'm not scared.
I mean, why would I be scared of a few shadows...
an eerie glow...
and an ominous gnawing sound?
Ahh! Gark! Do something!
Seriously, Gark, what is so complicated about
thinking before you act?!
It's like you're trying to destroy us!
Um, Max?
What now? Found another way to finish us off?
Actually, you're on fire.
Well, aren't you going to do something?
Uh... I'm thinking, like you told me to!
Do something!
Really?
Max?
See? No more fire!
Thinking's great, isn't it, Max?
Max...?
What?
Look at me!
You pushed me in that deep, scary... water!
But you said you weren't afraid of water!
Because I was lying!
But isn't lying wrong?
No! Not if it keeps you from going
in that stupid water!
This is your fault, being all reckless, jumping down holes,
setting fire to me, pushing me in the...
But I only did that because you said you knew
how to wrangle stuff... and things!
It's your fault for believing me!
It's just as much your fault!
It's not fair!
Hmph!
Hmph.
Hmph!
Argh!
Why did I think bringing frozen dinners was a good idea?!
Hmph.
C-c-cold.
Hmph!
Uh uh.
Uh...
Gark...
Huh?
We need to talk.
Are you me?
I guess you could say that... although I'm more like
an elementary reconsignment triggered by a deep
emotional discomfort within your subconscious.
Okay.
Max...
Huh?
We need to talk.
Are you me?
I'm more like an elementary re...
Yeah, you're never going to get it.
Anyway, you know why you're in this situation, right?
Yes.
It's all Gark's fault.
He's reckless, and he jumps down holes, and...
He just stood there doing nothing,
so of course it was all my fault we got lost.
If we listened to him, we wouldn't do anything!
Hmm.
"Oh, look at me. I'm cute and blue.
I have no idea how anything works."
Hmm.
"Oh, look at me. I'm Max."
I don't do this. I don't touch that.
"I don't do anything!"
Uh huh.
"Ha! I'm so happy and do stupid things with my tentacles!"
Ha! I push people into the water when they're on fire and
"save their lives!"
Oh.
"I prepare for every eventuality so I won't get lost!"
Uh huh.
Oh.
I'm sorry!
I'm even more sorry!
Right. We need to get home.
Yes. Let's think about it for a really long time first.
No, no, no. Just pick a tunnel, do your thing.
But that's the thing that got us lost in the first place!
No! Well, technically, yes, but it's better than
doing nothing like I do!
Okay... so, what would you not do?
Like, right now?
Move!
Okay!
Hmm.
You know, Gark, this is actually rather nice.
Yeah. It is, isn't it?
Yeah. We're doing great.
We're not doing great!
We need to do something right now!
But you said never do anything reckless!
Listen to me, Gark:
never listen to what I say!
You know who I think that is?
Curiosity!
Curiosity is going to kill us cats.
What do we do?
I really don't want to do anything!
I really want to do something reckless!
What are you two doing in my scuba class?
Oh, you couldn't wait to see me, could you?
And you brought me my jigsaw puzzle!
Jigsaw puzzle?
Ah. That's why it sounded broken:
because it's supposed to be!
Come on, my sweeties.
Let's go home, and all three of us can put it together.
You see, Gark?
Everything turns out just fine when you plan.
I wish I was that good at planning.
Say, I've never seen that road before.
Must be a shortcut.
Come on, kitties... let's find out!